Spirit Animals...yes, that sounds utterly reasonable.

We are SAVED!

Ke$ha (traditional wikipedia reference here) has a "find out which spirit animal you are" quiz on her website (quiz is here).

Now I don't actually know whether she believes in all this shit or not, so I can really make any ad hominumattacks…but I’m going to anyway.

Firstly, spirit animals. What the f*ck is a spirit animal? Are these the ghosts of our long dead pets, come back to haunt us for the years of mistreatment and neglect? Because if they are I do not want to find out which spirit animal I am.

I don’t want to find out I am an abused rabbit.

(photo from http://members.iinet.net.au/~rabbit/baitup.htm)

Looking at a few different sites (including one which purports to “come to this place in space and time to share our teachings and to be a part of this intricate weaving of shared knowledge”) it appears spirit animals are some kind of guide (depending on who you listen to) that in the native American Indian mythology enter into a person when they are born.

Sounds suspiciously like astrology. But ill rip that a new *sshole another day.

So what do these guides do? They guide you, idiot. You call on them and they give you grand advice. Like STOP LISTENING TO THE VOICES IN YOUR HEAD, IT’S WEIRD.

As you can tell, I am not a fan.

Now back to Ke$ha. Why put this on your website? You are a pop star, and much as that seems to attract messed up people (Lady Gaga) you don’t need to inflict this on other people. The less people know about spirit guides the better. I know you think they are mostly harmless, and in almost all cases they will be.

But you are still listening to a disembodied voice of an animal IN YOUR HEAD. And like a gateway drug this leads into the truly bizarre. If you loose your ability to critically examine the world, and just say: “yes, spirit guides can exist” then you can accept anything, and when the person comes along selling you the cure for cancer made from ultra-dilute substances (homeopathy bash!) and you take that instead of chemotherapy then it does do damage. I have met people who have lost family in this way.

It does damage.

“We invite you to walk with us through our tapestry... and to awaken knowledge that lies deep within your soul.”

Turns out my soul is full of hateful bile. No surprises there then.

P.S. Turns out my spirit is a wolf. Cool